Dear Diary
by EvilmindedchilD
Summary: Max has given Fang a diary for his use- and possibly the rest of the flocks- and he intends to write down the main event in each day. Rated T for language.
1. The Comedy Show

**A/N: Random spawning of an idea to give Fang a diary and see what he writes. Hopefully this will work out for the best.**

**Disclaimer: EvilmindedchilD does not own Maximum Ride or any of it's characters. All she owns are her own ideas and imagination.**

*sigh* The reason I'm writing this is because Max gave me this damn thing and expects me to. I don't want a bloody nose, so I figured I'd give it a shot.

I'm Fang, I'm about 15 years old and I live –insert town name here-. What, you didn't really think I'd tell you where I am, did you? I'd have thought you smarter than that, diary.

I'm a bird kid. My DNA was grafted with that of an avian, therefore giving me the curse – I mean, _ability _to fly. But you know this already.

Today, Max decided we should all go see a comedy show. I honestly thought she was joking, until we got there. We sat in a _dark_ theatre with _one _exit and a lot of other _people_. I was twitching insanely, but the kids were laughing so hard they were crying. There was some improvisation, some scripted acts, this thing called "delayed reactions", where someone would say something like, "I dropped your iPod in the toilet" and the guy would just stand there and keep smiling. Then, a minute later, he'd yell, "Nooooooo!". There was also one where his girlfriend broke up with him and walked away, and he stood there. Then, another guy walked in and began to speak, when the delayed reaction guy yelled, "But I love you!" to the guy who walked in. It was pretty well done, I must admit. You know, aside from the close space.

Afterwards, we went into a food court to get lunch. Everyone had something different: Thai food, Subway, Burger King, Greek, Chinese, Tim Horton's, and Total had some frozen yogurt from a little stand. All in all, it was a good day.

Yeah, so I'm done for now. Max can't say I didn't use this thing.

Flying High,

Fang

**A/N: What do you guys think? Should I continue with Fang's diary entries? Should I pass off the diary to someone else? Should it be for the whole flock to use? Let me know.**

**Rate and Review, please! And check out my other MR Fanfic!**


	2. Skating

**A/N: Alright, Chapter two, coming atcha! Be prepared. OH, and I was thinking of trying a bit of cosplaying as Angel with Idiotic Freak. Buuuut we won't manage to get it up (that's what she said) until after New Years. So yeah. Unless I somehow get her to do it today...**

Fang here, coming at you with another day in my life.

So today, we went skating. Max is off her rocker, seeing as again, it's a closed area with _no_ escape routes. But, we went anyways. The only reason I showed up is because I love her.

It was… difficult. I'd never skated in my life, nor had the rest of the flock. I caught onto it easily, but Max and the others, well… Suffice to say, it was hectic. There were these ass hats that kept skating past the flock at an incredible speed, nearly knocking over Nudge and one bumped into Gazzy.

Poor Iggy had it worst, though. He was bumping into people left and right, until the janitor in the rink made him get off the ice. I was trying really hard not to laugh at him. ((It should be noted that I failed miserably.))

Angel did okay, she was gliding past the others, but she fell once or twice. I showed her how to get up when she did, but she used the wall anyways.

Max was skating with some guy she met, holding hands with him and getting dragged along. I nearly wringed his neck when I caught up to them and whisked Max away. She's _my_ girlfriend. Not his.

All in all, it wasn't very fun. We made a pact never to go skating again. Like, _**EVER**_. For the sake of all of our sanities.

Flying High,

Fang

**A/N: So if you haven't figured out by now, this is basically my own personal blog, just in Fang's perspective. Except the part about Max skating with someone else, because frankly, I'm single. If anyone wants to hook up, let me know ;)**

**R&R, please!**


	3. Bacon

**A/N: Hey all, Evil here. So here's the deal with this story. Since it's based off my life, and events that happen in it, I can only write another chapter when something **_**happens**_**. Right now, life is boring as all heck. I mean, I'm going over to a friends, but Fang doesn't have friends outside the flock, so that wouldn't make sense. Ugh, I'm rambling.**

**Angel: You really are.**

**Me: Angel! Get out of here. I don't need my dual personality talking to me. I get enough of that out of Roxas.**

**Roxas: Hey! I'm not that annoying, am I?**

**Angel: Well, I don't know who you are, but I think she does find you annoying.**

**Me: … Thank you for that insight, Angel. Now, you can do the disclaimer, or shut up and go away.**

**Angel: She doesn't own me…**

**Roxas: …or me, for that matter.**

**Angel: She accepts that all rights…**

**Roxas: …go to their respective owners.**

**Me: Okay, now you can leave.**

Alright, this is probably going to be the most EPIC thing I ever put in this diary. So, here goes.

We were all eating breakfast this morning, as per usual. Iggy had happened to cook bacon, and I admittedly took half the plate. What, I like bacon!

Iggy reached over, and I stared at his hand. He picked up some of my bacon, and shoved it in his mouth.

"Iggy. The bacon plate is over _there_." I told him, smacking his hand away when he reached for more of my bacon.

"Oh, I know." He responded, a smirk stretching across his face as he took some more bacon off my plate. I glared at him despite its uselessness.

"Okay, Iggy. If you take another piece of my bacon, I'm going to have to spit in your food. It's just going to have to happen, since you like dirtying up other people's bacon." I warned him as his hand hovered over my plate. I stared at it, waiting to see if I'd have to spit in his eggs or not.

The hand inched downwards, toward my bacon. _My bacon_. "Ah!" I warned, and his hand jerked up and down. "Oh!" I hissed as it picked up the bacon. Suffice to say, my hand shot forward and knocked it out of his. I think it landed on the floor.

I stood up and spat in Iggy's eggs. He looked at me (so to speak), and then at his eggs. Then he picked up his fork, and lifted a scrambled baby chicken to his mouth. And he ate it. **(Ew. Scrambled baby chicken? I didn't need that mental image.)**

I grabbed the table cloth and ripped it from the, uh, table. Dishes went flying, and a fork hit the picture on the wall with Jeb. It landed squarely on Iggy's face. Bulls eye.

Iggy stood up and shoved the table over. It clattered loudly against the linoleum tile. We squared off, and the flock gathered around us, chanting, "Fight! Fight! Fight!"

I dove at Iggy, and he sidestepped me. What? How the hell did he do that? He's blind, for Christ sake! But as I turned around to go at him again, I was tackled to the floor. He swung a punch at me, but I dodged it easily. I shoved him off me and jumped up karate style. You know, where you kick your feet up and kind of hump the air to pull yourself up? Yeah, like that.

A lot of karate chops and ninja kicks were exchanged, and I landed Iggy with a broken nose and a black eye, while receiving a gash on my forehead and a split lip. We circled each other, waiting to see who would make the first move.

I was about to lunge at Iggy, when out of nowhere, our front door bursts open, and Idiotic Freak walked in yelling, "I AM THE REAL SLIM SHADY. THE REST OF YOU? YOU'RE ALL POSERS. I. AM. SLIM. SHA…dy. Oh." She looked at the flock, arms frozen in the air mid fist pump, Nudge sort of hovering above us, and me and Iggy mid punch. We all just stared back at her.

"Oh. Uh, hi. Wrong house… I'll just, you know, let myself out." She said awkwardly, half waving to us as she walked out the door. We looked after her, wondering in unison what the hell that was about.

We eventually gave up wondering when the fire alarm went off, knocking us out of our haze. Me and Iggy resumed fighting, while the rest of the flock screamed at each other about who had been watching the rest of the bacon while it cooked. I don't know, I wasn't really listening.

A crash came from the window, and I looked over to see Max ushering everyone out of the house, which was now burning down. Flames surrounded me and Iggy, but I only saw for a second, because then Iggy punched my jaw and I had to continue with our fight. I smirked at him as I punched him in the mouth, effectively splitting his lip and spurting blood onto my shirt.

For the second time during the fight, the front door opened. This time, neither me or Iggy looked to see who it was, for fear of getting hit by the other. Iggy kicked out my legs and I fell to the floor.

Of course, then we realize who walked into our house. I didn't actually _see_ her, but I figured out who it was before Iggy knocked me unconscious. I heard it as I drifted out.

"Just gonna stand there and watch me burn! But that's alright, because I like the way it hurts!"

**A/N: Uh huh. Rihanna was in my Fanfic. I don't own her, either. I know that was really random, but me and, you guessed it, Idiotic Freak came up with this on a spur of the moment thing. Mostly because her brother ate her bacon this morning, and she had to spit in his eggs because of it. So… yeah. R&R, please and thankies! **


	4. Chapter 35

**A/N: Okay, so… life is boring. Literally, NOTHING is happening. I suppose I could do a New Years one, but I think I might start a new Fanfic soon. What about, I'm not sure. Maybe something outside of MR and Princess Bride. BUT. I'm holding a contest to decide what to do for the next chapter.**

**I have a playlist. Wanna see it? Well, you'll have to assemble it to figure it out.**

**"Wait for it! There are only two, things, now! This great black night, and the fire glow! "**

**"These city streets are burning. Rose red your wheels are turning."**

**"Oh, and the smokes in that cigarette box, on the table they just so, happen to be laced… with… nitroglycerin."**

**"Looking at you makes it harder. But I know that you'll find another. That doesn't always make you wanna cry."**

**"Can I get a wish? To end the politics? And get back to the music that started this sh*t?"**

**"Why we have to go and change things? Not touching you is such a strange thing."**

**"Thinking sorrow was perfection. I would wallow until you told me."**

**"I'll knit you a sweater. I wanna wrap you up in my love forever."**

**"Where do we go? How do we know? What we're ever really after."**

**And two movie songs.**

**"One trick ahead of disaster. They're quick, but I'm much faster."**

**"Still feel your breath, on my skin. I hear your voice, deep within."**

**"The night is my companion, and solitude my guide."**

**What do you get if you win? You get to send me an idea to write into a story, which I will defiantly use. No second place here, people. First person to guess them ALL correctly wins. Now… go!**


	5. The Card Game

**A/N: Okay, okay. Calm down. I know it's been a while, but some stuff finally happened that's worth writing about. So, here you go.**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Maximum Ride or any of its characters, only my own crazy stories and schemes.**

Well, diary, today was interesting.

I was playing a game of cards called 'Signal' with Iggy, Max, and Nudge. Me and Iggy vs. the girls. I admit, it was probably a bad move to pick the blind guy as a partner for a game that heavily relies on vision.

I drummed my fingers on the table, the signal that meant I had four of a kind. Max took one look at me and instantly yelled, "SIGNAL!"

Iggy looked around, obviously confused. "Wait. Nudge signal, or did you?" Iggy asked.

"Fang did." Max said, laying her cards flat on the table and shoving them at me. I grumbled as I collected everyone's cards and shuffled the deck. I glared at Iggy, wanting to punch him, but Max still hadn't really forgiven us about that whole, 'almost burned the house down over eggs' thing last month, so I didn't.

I dealt out the cards, and took a look at mine and Iggy's. Iggy had a 4, a 6, and two 7's. I had a 7, an 8, and two 4's. I switched our cards so I had three 7's and Iggy had three 4's. "Okay, Ig. When I get all my cards, I'll call out to Gazzy. Okay? When you hear me call for Gazzy, call signal." I ordered. Iggy nodded and looked straight ahead.

The game went fast, and within a few hands I had four 7's. "Hey, Gazzy! Come here!" I called out. I didn't look at Iggy, because it would instantly be given away. Iggy, however, stayed silent.

The Gasman appeared behind me. "Yeah, Fang? What is it?" he asked, looking at me in that 9 year old way.

"Well, GAZZY. You know, GAZZY is a really odd nickname, don't you think, GAZZY?" I said, risking a glance at Iggy. Nudge caught my eye and smiled at me.

"SIGNAL!" she screamed, and I slammed my head on the table. Iggy looked up.

"What did I miss? I was trying to see what cards I had." He asked. I proceeded to hit my head on the table multiple times.

**This chapter is based off of a game of Signal that we played today, me, Idiotic Freak, Jadon, and Kareem. It didn't really go like this, but me and Idiotic didn't want to go outside because of the snow falling. Her excuse? "If snow falls in your eyes, then I could blind you, and you'd walk into a bunch of stuff!" I shot her a look and replied, "Or send a ton of wolf people after you." Then together, we literally yelled, "OR GIVE YOU WINGS." We then proceeded to laugh our butts off as we went to get our stuff.**

**Anyways, R&R, and no, don't relax. Review, please!**


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